The Witch-King of the North of Halsoni is a colossal, socially progressive nation, ruled by the Witch-King of Angmaruben with a fair hand, and notable for its ubiquitous missile silos, pith helmet sales, and multi-spousal wedding ceremonies. The hard-nosed, hard-working, democratic population of 6.367 billion Halsonians live in a state of perpetual fear, as a complete breakdown of social order has led to the rise of order through biker gangs.

The large, corrupt, liberal government prioritizes Defense, with Administration, Industry, and Healthcare also on the agenda, while Spirituality isn't funded at all. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Angmaruben. The average income tax rate is 71.3%.

The frighteningly efficient Halsonian economy, worth 852 trillion dollaridoos a year, is led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Tourism, Woodchip Exports, and Retail. Black market activity is rampant. Average income is an impressive 133,916 dollaridoos, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 3.8 times as much as the poorest.

Parking's carefree without parking car fees, the government makes bereaved siblings into bereaved orphans, citizens are being told that the greatness of a nation's power is the measure of its surrender, and the unofficial motto of the nation's intelligence agency is "in Bont we trust". Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Halsoni's national animal is the doggo, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Rubenist Flemingovianism.

Halsoni is ranked 226,189^th in the world and 4,283^rd in The North Pacific for Most Primitive, scoring -113.01 on the Scary Big Number Scale.