The Most Excellent Empire of Picairn is a colossal, cultured nation, ruled by Emperor Menellia I with a fair hand, and renowned for its sprawling nuclear power plants, national health service, and irreverence towards religion. The compassionate, democratic, cheerful population of 8.253 billion Picairnians are free to do what they want with their own bodies, and vote for whomever they like in elections; if they go into business, however, they are regulated to within an inch of their lives.

The medium-sized, liberal, outspoken government juggles the competing demands of Education, Administration, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Stormridge. The average income tax rate is 98.1%.

The frighteningly efficient Picairnian economy, worth a remarkable 2,066 trillion Dollars a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Tourism, Book Publishing, and Arms Manufacturing. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an amazing 250,434 Dollars, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

A widely accepted trade policy is "tit-for-tat", it takes months to get the proper permits for a child's first tricycle, children are brainwashed at a young age to accept "love and peace!" as a way of life, and factories grind to a halt every time there is an election. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown. Picairn's national animal is the Phoenix, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies, and its national religion is Secularism.

Picairn is ranked 14,204^th in the world and 518^th in The North Pacific for Most Secular, with 85.77 Atheism Rate.