The Holy Republic of North Bratislava is a colossal, socially progressive nation, ruled by Old Saxophone Joe with a fair hand, and renowned for its rum-swilling pirates, national health service, and keen interest in outer space. The compassionate, democratic, cheerful, devout population of 7.699 billion North Bratislavans love a good election, and the government gives them plenty of them. Universities tend to be full of students debating the merits of various civil and political rights, while businesses are tightly regulated and the wealthy viewed with suspicion.

The large, socially-minded, outspoken government juggles the competing demands of Education, Administration, and Environment. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Dinkytown. The average income tax rate is 97.4%.

The frighteningly efficient North Bratislavan economy, worth a remarkable 1,479 trillion pounds a year, is quite specialized and led by the Tourism industry, with major contributions from Book Publishing and Information Technology. Average income is an impressive 192,218 pounds, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Violently opinionated speakers can be heard preaching their hateful views on every street corner, the nation is known as the cheapskates of The North Pacific, the national anthem is considered broadly offensive to those who don't believe in Bratislavan Orthodoxy, and betting pennies on games of Go Fish is considered deviant. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown. North Bratislava's national animal is the bison, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Bratislavan Orthodoxy.

North Bratislava is ranked 7,081^st in the world and 339^th in The North Pacific for Highest Average Incomes, with 192,218.52 Standard Monetary Units.