The Kingdom of PlanetMercury is a colossal, efficient nation, ruled by Freddie Mercury with an even hand, and notable for its keen interest in outer space, aversion to nipples, and suspicion of poets. The hard-nosed, humorless, devout population of 7.746 billion PlanetMercuries have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

The relatively small, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Law & Order, Defense, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Kensington. The average income tax rate is 37.1%, but much higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient PlanetMercuryian economy, worth a remarkable 2,014 trillion pounds a year, is fairly diversified and mostly comprised of black market activity, especially in Arms Manufacturing, Information Technology, Uranium Mining, and Woodchip Exports. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an amazing 260,094 pounds, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.1 times as much as the poorest.

Mantis shrimp studies is academia's fastest-growing field, whenever pilots have to bail out the government bails out their company, veteran cops reminisce over their heavy armor days, and Freddie Mercury is worshipped as a god. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. PlanetMercury's national animal is the Cat, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation.

PlanetMercury is ranked 81,761^st in the world and 2,509^th in The North Pacific for Most Income Equality, scoring 46.85 on the Marx-Engels Emancipation Scale.