The Gothic Realm of Porde is a mammoth, safe nation, ruled by Gailawera Ahwanan with an even hand, and remarkable for its parental licensing program, compulsory military service, and complete lack of prisons. The compassionate, humorless population of 5.381 billion Pordians are fiercely patriotic and enjoy great social equality; they tend to view other, more capitalist countries as somewhat immoral and corrupt.

The enormous, corrupt, socially-minded government juggles the competing demands of Education, Administration, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Mangup. The average income tax rate is 95.7%.

The frighteningly efficient Pordian economy, worth 858 trillion pors a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector is led by the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Tourism, Book Publishing, and Retail. Average income is an impressive 159,537 pors, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

The tools of the trade for landmine clearance appear to be copious amounts of gasoline and a box of matches, intoxicated AI mobile platforms are sometimes seen crashing through windows instead of being crashed by them, bigly crowds of election officials can be spotted at music festivals, and political spontaneity takes a lot of planning. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Porde's national animal is the eagle, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies.

Porde is ranked 64,963^rd in the world and 79^th in Forest for Rudest Citizens, with 71.17 insults per minute.