by Max Barry

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Most Advanced Defense Forces: 133rdMost Devout: 369thMost Ignorant Citizens: 492nd
The Holy Pink Morons of
Iron Fist Consumerists
All Hail The Magic Conch
The Magic Conch
Influence
Apprentice
Region
Civil Rights
Unheard Of
Economy
All-Consuming
Political Freedom
Outlawed

Overview Factbook Dispatches Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards

PatrickStar

Population17.355 billion

CapitalShell City
LeaderThe Magic Conch
FaithConchism

CurrencyPatrick
AnimalPatrick

The Holy Pink Morons of PatrickStar is a gargantuan, orderly nation, ruled by The Magic Conch with an iron fist, and notable for its deadly medical pandemics, triple-decker prams, and rampant corporate plagiarism. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless, devout population of 17.355 billion Patrick are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The enormous, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government is dominated by the Department of Defense, with Spirituality, Law & Order, and Administration also on the agenda, while Welfare and Social Policy are ignored. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Shell City. The average income tax rate is 97.1%.

The all-consuming Patrick economy, worth a remarkable 4,527 trillion Patricks a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is an enormous, deeply entrenched, highly specialized black market in Arms Manufacturing, Uranium Mining, and Woodchip Exports. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an amazing 260,903 Patricks, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.0 times as much as the poorest.

Single celebrities have to repeatedly prove their chastity to avoid being married off to infatuated fans, laughter while watching foreign diplomats disrobe tends to make diplomatic talks counterproductive, burning members of the Order of Violet is the nation's favorite pastime, and foreign lack of enthusiasm for Patrick nose-flute disco metal is seen as a reasonable casus belli. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. PatrickStar's national animal is the Patrick, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation, and its national religion is Conchism.

PatrickStar is ranked 284,265th in the world and 91st in Texas for Safest, scoring 3.69 on the Bubble-Rapp Safety Rating.

Top
1%
Most Advanced Defense Forces: 133rdMost Devout: 369thMost Ignorant Citizens: 492ndLargest Black Market: 659thMost Corrupt Governments: 1,272ndLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 1,310thMost Primitive: 2,116thMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 2,139thLargest Manufacturing Sector: 2,167thLargest Mining Sector: 2,197thTop
5%
Most Politically Apathetic Citizens: 3,518thMost Avoided: 3,732ndHighest Poor Incomes: 3,764thNudest: 3,767thHighest Average Tax Rates: 3,787thHighest Economic Output: 3,951stLowest Crime Rates: 3,973rdHighest Average Incomes: 4,717thLargest Governments: 4,741stMost Influential: 5,576thMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 6,233rdMost Valuable International Artwork: 7,116thMost Patriotic: 7,381stMost Advanced Public Transport: 9,673rdMost World Assembly Endorsements: 10,883rdLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 12,069thMost Subsidized Industry: 13,130thTop
10%
Most Authoritarian: 14,639thHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 17,220thHighest Wealthy Incomes: 18,272ndMost Conservative: 18,422ndMost Advanced Public Education: 19,608thLargest Populations: 21,487thMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 25,943rd
Top
5%
Most Primitive: 1st in the regionMost Ignorant Citizens: 1st in the regionMost Advanced Defense Forces: 2nd in the regionMost Devout: 2nd in the regionLargest Black Market: 3rd in the regionNudest: 3rd in the regionLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 3rd in the regionMost Corrupt Governments: 3rd in the regionMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 4th in the regionMost Authoritarian: 4th in the regionMost Patriotic: 4th in the regionLargest Manufacturing Sector: 4th in the regionTop
10%
Largest Mining Sector: 5th in the regionMost Conservative: 5th in the regionHighest Average Tax Rates: 5th in the regionLowest Crime Rates: 6th in the regionMost Valuable International Artwork: 7th in the regionHighest Poor Incomes: 8th in the regionMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 8th in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 8th in the regionMost Extreme: 8th in the regionLargest Governments: 8th in the regionMost Advanced Public Transport: 9th in the regionMost Avoided: 9th in the regionMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 9th in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : PatrickStar was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Most Valuable International Artwork.
  • : PatrickStar was ranked in the Top 1% of the world for Largest Black Market and Most Primitive and the Top 5% for Highest Average Incomes, Highest Economic Output, and Most Avoided.
  • : PatrickStar was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Most Authoritarian.
  • : PatrickStar was endorsed by The Gigantic Frozen Igloo of Studly Penguins.
  • : PatrickStar was ranked in the Top 10% of the world for Most Eco-Friendly Governments.
  • : PatrickStar was ranked in the Top 10% of the world for Most Eco-Friendly Governments.
  • : PatrickStar was ranked in the Top 10% of the world for Most Zombies and Most Dead.
  • : PatrickStar was ravaged by a Zombie Walker Horde from Heavolia, infecting 25 million survivors.
  • : PatrickStar was ravaged by a Zombie Walker Horde from Heavolia, infecting 35 million survivors.
  • : PatrickStar was ravaged by a Zombie Walker Horde from Heavolia, infecting 33 million survivors.

More...

World Assembly

Endorsements Received: 3 » NewTexas, Indian Empire, and Studly Penguins.

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