The Federal Republic of Kawany is a gargantuan, safe nation, ruled by Kawani with a fair hand, and remarkable for its daily referendums, ubiquitous missile silos, and unlimited-speed roads. The compassionate, hard-working, democratic, cheerful population of 12.233 billion Kawanyians hold their civil and political rights very dear, although the wealthy and those in business tend to be viewed with suspicion.

The large government juggles the competing demands of Education, Industry, and Administration. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Hawler. The average income tax rate is 96.0%.

The frighteningly efficient Kawanyian economy, worth a remarkable 2,170 trillion Dinars a year, is quite specialized and led by the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Tourism, Book Publishing, and Basket Weaving. Average income is an impressive 177,455 Dinars, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Sharks are enjoying their deliveries of canned food, government officials have to mortgage their homes to make ends meet, children often explain to their parents that the Mega Ultimate Sword Fist was worth the thousand-Dinar charge on their phone bill, and rock and roll involves rolling literal rocks in prison. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Kawany's national animal is the Eagle, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies, and its national religion is Secular.

Kawany is ranked 214,779^th in the world and 314^th in The Leftist Assembly for Largest Retail Industry, scoring -8.89 on the Shrinkwrap Consignment Productivity Index.