The Pink Holy Christmas of South Otselic is a gargantuan, orderly nation, ruled by Dracula with an iron fist, and renowned for its compulsory military service, infamous sell-swords, and punitive income tax rates. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless, devout population of 25.783 billion South Otselicians are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The medium-sized, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government prioritizes Defense, with Law & Order, Education, and Industry also on the agenda, while International Aid and Social Policy are ignored. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Yggdrassil. The average income tax rate is 93.7%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient South Otselician economy, worth a remarkable 8,554 trillion candy canes a year, is fairly diversified and mostly comprised of black market activity, especially in Arms Manufacturing, Information Technology, and Woodchip Exports. Average income is an amazing 331,785 candy canes, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Suppression of pro-democracy protests is a daily occurrence, ponies are brutally murdered before being left to rot (South Otselic has found 7 easter eggs), main battle tanks stalk the woods of South Otselic in search of bats, and the police have been known to wiretap confessional boxes. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. South Otselic's national animal is the bat, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to toxic air pollution, and its national religion is athyism.

South Otselic is ranked 310,918^th in the world and 371^st in Christians for Least Corrupt Governments, with 3.24 percentage of bribes refused.