The Imperial Commonwealth of Saint Marinas is a massive, cultured nation, ruled by Emperor Murzkull Dur-Djurfúng Hamoff VII with an iron fist, and notable for its enslaved workforce, ubiquitous missile silos, and parental licensing program. The hard-nosed, cynical, devout population of 4.757 billion Saint Marinasai are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The large, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government prioritizes Defense, although Administration, Law & Order, and Industry are also considered important, while Social Policy and International Aid aren't funded at all. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Mónte Marina. The average income tax rate is 80.6%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Saint Marinisian economy, worth 816 trillion knoins a year, is fairly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Information Technology, Tourism, and Uranium Mining. Black market activity is rampant. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 171,672 knoins, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.7 times as much as the poorest.

The examiners who examine examiners are being examined by examiners, government officials have to mortgage their homes to make ends meet, the cruise missile launchers on the field hospital roof are purely deterrent in purpose, and traffic cops spend most of their work-hours calculating citizens' monthly income. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Saint Marinas's national animal is the mallard duck and its national religion is The Church of the Emperor.

Saint Marinas is ranked 115,390^th in the world and 5,949^th in Lazarus for Most Beautiful Environments, with 549.61 pounds of wildlife per square mile.