The Armed Republic of Paleocacher is a gargantuan, socially progressive nation, ruled by President Fulkerson with an even hand, and renowned for its museums and concert halls, otherworldly petting zoo, and smutty television. The compassionate, cheerful population of 31.087 billion Paleocacherians have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

The medium-sized, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Education. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Gardena. The average income tax rate is 63.2%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Paleocacherian economy, worth a remarkable 6,880 trillion Selkies a year, is led by the Tourism industry, with major contributions from Arms Manufacturing, Information Technology, and Book Publishing. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an amazing 221,341 Selkies, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Preschoolers outnumber veteran politicians in government, visiting dignitaries often end up cuddling in the hot tub with President Fulkerson, deceased relatives are considered property to buy and sell, and scientists on maritime expeditions return with a healthy glow. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Paleocacher's national animal is the Red Wolf, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Paleocacher is ranked 237,866^th in the world and 239^th in The League for Most Extreme, scoring 9.36 on the Paul-Nader Subjective Decentrality Index.