The Second Grand Republic of Auld-Statd is a titanic, cultured nation, ruled by Mr Grand President with an even hand, and remarkable for its multi-spousal wedding ceremonies, absence of drug laws, and punitive income tax rates. The compassionate, cheerful population of 12.162 billion Auld-Statdians enjoy extensive civil freedoms, particularly in social issues, while business tends to be more regulated.

The medium-sized, liberal government juggles the competing demands of Education, Administration, and Healthcare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Saltsdock. The average income tax rate is 65.2%.

The frighteningly efficient Auld-Statdian economy, worth a remarkable 1,684 trillion Acorns a year, is quite specialized and led by the Tourism industry, with major contributions from Book Publishing and Information Technology. Average income is an impressive 138,512 Acorns, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 3.0 times as much as the poorest.

Dissing one's former country is a prerequisite to apply for Auld-Statdian citizenship, politicians tend to jump ship to whichever party is currently leading in the polls, the consent form for routine blood pressure measurement has been nominated for the 'Novel Of The Year' award, and visitors often wonder about the new red dartboard in Mr Grand President's office. Crime is totally unknown. Auld-Statd's national animal is the Clan Cat, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Secularism.

Auld-Statd is ranked 282,682^nd in the world and 10,609^th in Balder for Fattest Citizens, with 6.04 Obesity Rate.