The Empire of Scaletta is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by Vito Scaletta with an iron fist, and renowned for its compulsory military service, avowedly heterosexual populace, and avant-garde cinema. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless population of 11.152 billion Scalettans are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

The large, corrupt, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Healthcare, Law & Order, and Education. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Empire Bay. The average income tax rate is 73.4%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Scalettan economy, worth a remarkable 1,275 trillion SE Credits a year, is led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Tourism, Arms Manufacturing, and Book Publishing. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 114,337 SE Credits, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Rumor has it that Vito Scaletta has won three lotteries in a row, children gain their first sex education from reading the dictionary, photographers have to apply for a license to photograph Vito Scaletta, and scientists are researching the best way to kill off humanity to prevent catastrophic war. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Scaletta's national animal is the Penguin, which frolics freely in the nation's sparkling oceans.

Scaletta is ranked 37,937^th in the world and 119^th in Europeia for Most Patriotic, with 33.41 flags saluted per person per day.