The Empire of Dogteeth is a colossal, genial nation, renowned for its museums and concert halls, pith helmet sales, and keen interest in outer space. The compassionate, democratic population of 6.468 billion Dogteethians are fiercely patriotic and enjoy great social equality; they tend to view other, more capitalist countries as somewhat immoral and corrupt.

The enormous, socially-minded government juggles the competing demands of Education, Healthcare, and Defense. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Pawstep City. The average income tax rate is 85.7%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The strong Dogteethian economy, worth 570 trillion marks a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector is led by the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Tourism, Arms Manufacturing, and Uranium Mining. Average income is 88,264 marks, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Country folk are sent to obligatory boarding schools to learn how to be civilized, quiet professionalism has returned to the nation's armed forces, transgender and agender are on the education agenda, and it is illegal to distribute Girl Guide Cookies without an advanced food hygiene diploma. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Dogteeth's national animal is the mongrel, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Dogteeth is ranked 206,703^rd in the world and 5,358^th in the Rejected Realms for Most Corrupt Governments, with 1.14 kickbacks per hour.