by Max Barry

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Most Advanced Law Enforcement: 71st Most Subsidized Industry: 752nd Largest Black Market: 889th
The Empire of
Corrupt Dictatorship
We Ride Together, We Die Together
Influence
Apprentice
Civil Rights
Below Average
Economy
Frightening
Political Freedom
Few

Overview Factbook Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend

Crazy Firemen

Population16.439 billion

CapitalSeagrave
LeaderFirefighter Clemente

CurrencyBrotherhood
AnimalPhoenix

The Empire of Crazy Firemen is a gargantuan, safe nation, ruled by Firefighter Clemente with an iron fist, and remarkable for its free-roaming dinosaurs, otherworldly petting zoo, and hatred of cheese. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless, devout population of 16.439 billion Crazy Firemenians are ruled with an iron fist by the dictatorship government, which ensures that no-one outside the party gets too rich. In their personal lives, however, citizens are relatively unoppressed; it remains to be seen whether this is because the government genuinely cares about its people, or if it hasn't gotten around to stamping out civil rights yet.

The government — a sprawling, bureaucracy-choked, corrupt morass — juggles the competing demands of Law & Order, Defense, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Seagrave. The average income tax rate is 94.9%.

The frighteningly efficient Crazy Firemenian economy, worth a remarkable 2,247 trillion Brotherhoods a year, is highly specialized and mostly made up of the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Book Publishing and Tourism. Black market activity is rampant. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is an impressive 136,705 Brotherhoods, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.8 times as much as the poorest.

Political parties are banned from advertising and receiving private donations, the nation is currently revamping its entire education system, citizens are permitted to carry concealed handguns, and movie producers send film critics wads of cash in their morning newspapers in anticipation of gushing praise. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Crazy Firemen's national animal is the Phoenix, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies.

Crazy Firemen is ranked 168,368th in the world and 3,225th in the Rejected Realms for Largest Automobile Manufacturing Sector, scoring -29.05 on the Henry Ford Productivity Index.

Top
1%
Most Advanced Law Enforcement: 71stMost Subsidized Industry: 752ndLargest Black Market: 889thMost Advanced Defense Forces: 1,434thMost Efficient Economies: 1,686thTop
5%
Most Corrupt Governments: 2,810thMost World Assembly Endorsements: 3,939thHighest Economic Output: 4,112thLowest Crime Rates: 4,285thMost Influential: 4,288thMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 4,576thMost Beautiful Environments: 4,937thHighest Average Tax Rates: 5,052ndMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 5,054thMost Devout: 5,862ndLargest Populations: 5,957thLargest Governments: 6,673rdMost Stationary: 6,729thMost Developed: 7,289thHighest Foreign Aid Spending: 7,527thMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 8,023rdLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 8,201stMost Advanced Public Transport: 8,377thLongest Average Lifespans: 8,410thTop
10%
Most Advanced Public Education: 8,924thHealthiest Citizens: 13,400thBest Weather: 13,611thHighest Poor Incomes: 14,271stHighest Average Incomes: 15,079thLargest Manufacturing Sector: 16,107th
Top
1%
Most Advanced Law Enforcement: 4th in the regionMost Subsidized Industry: 20th in the regionLargest Black Market: 24th in the regionMost Advanced Defense Forces: 31st in the regionTop
5%
Most Influential: 40th in the regionMost Efficient Economies: 40th in the regionMost World Assembly Endorsements: 41st in the regionMost Stationary: 43rd in the regionMost Corrupt Governments: 73rd in the regionMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 81st in the regionMost Beautiful Environments: 88th in the regionLowest Crime Rates: 93rd in the regionHighest Economic Output: 93rd in the regionLargest Populations: 94th in the regionHighest Average Tax Rates: 99th in the regionMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 103rd in the regionMost Devout: 104th in the regionHighest Foreign Aid Spending: 113th in the regionLargest Governments: 127th in the regionMost Developed: 134th in the regionMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 148th in the regionLongest Average Lifespans: 150th in the regionMost Advanced Public Transport: 154th in the regionTop
10%
Most Advanced Public Education: 167th in the regionLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 173rd in the regionHealthiest Citizens: 227th in the regionBest Weather: 234th in the regionHighest Poor Incomes: 244th in the regionSafest: 251st in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 299th in the regionLargest Manufacturing Sector: 320th in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : Following new legislation in Crazy Firemen, movie producers send film critics wads of cash in their morning newspapers in anticipation of gushing praise.
  • : Crazy Firemen was endorsed by The Empire of Duo the god.
  • : Crazy Firemen was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Longest Average Lifespans.
  • : Following new legislation in Crazy Firemen, citizens are permitted to carry concealed handguns.
  • : Following new legislation in Crazy Firemen, the nation is currently revamping its entire education system.
  • : Following new legislation in Crazy Firemen, political parties are banned from advertising and receiving private donations.
  • : Crazy Firemen was reclassified from "Inoffensive Centrist Democracy" to "Corrupt Dictatorship".
  • : Following new legislation in Crazy Firemen, pharmaceutical companies emphatically promise that "your pills are in the mail" rather than admit any supply shortfall.
  • : Following new legislation in Crazy Firemen, the acceptance of acupuncture and other alternative therapies has needled the scientific community.
  • : Crazy Firemen voted for the World Assembly Resolution "Ozone Layer Protection".

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