The Cringe of Cringe Town is a colossal, efficient nation, ruled by Dwayne Johnson with an iron fist, and notable for its ban on automobiles, flagrant waste-dumping, and complete lack of public education. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless, devout population of 5.039 billion Rock Worshippers are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The large, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Administration. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Cringe Hut. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 78.7%.

The frighteningly efficient Cringe economy, worth 737 trillion Pesos a year, is quite specialized and mostly comprised of black market activity, especially in Arms Manufacturing, Uranium Mining, Woodchip Exports, and Trout Farming. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is an impressive 146,324 Pesos, but there is a large disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 610,548 per year while the poor average 22,891, a ratio of 26.7 to 1.

Industry tycoons rarely hide their misdeeds due to the government's habit of bailing them out, the government's fruit business reeks of rotting produce and corruption, the government has put a kid glove on the invisible hand of the free market, and the derisively named "Morlocks of Moria" futilely demand time in the sun. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force. Cringe Town's national animal is the Rock, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation, and its national religion is Rock.

Cringe Town is ranked 290,804^th in the world and 430^th in United Kingdom for Nicest Citizens, with 0.19 average smiles per day.