The Empire of BrightonBurg is a gargantuan, orderly nation, ruled by Kaiser Janos II with an iron fist, and remarkable for its closed borders, ban on automobiles, and complete absence of social welfare. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless, devout population of 30.481 billion BrightonBurgians are ruled with an iron fist by the corrupt, dictatorship government, which oppresses anyone who isn't on the board of a Fortune 500 company. Large corporations tend to be above the law, and use their financial clout to gain ever-increasing government benefits at the expense of the poor and unemployed.

The minute, corrupt, moralistic, pro-business, well-organized government, or what there is of one, is solely concerned with Defense. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Greater Brightonburg City. Income tax is unheard of.

The frighteningly efficient BrightonBurgian economy, worth an astonishing 13,955 trillion Gold or Silver Kronor a year, is driven almost entirely by the private sector, which is broadly diversified and led by the Uranium Mining industry, with significant contributions from Retail, Woodchip Exports, and Door-to-door Insurance Sales. Average income is an amazing 457,856 Gold or Silver Kronor, but there is an enormous disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 2,510,703 per year while the poor average 42,520, a ratio of 59.0 to 1.

The dead are minced up and sold to people in burger form, authorities are looking for a stool pigeon to rat out who is stealing food from pigeon toilets, the country's famous rainforests are being bulldozed by the mining industry, and the most penniless demographics have by far the highest number of researchers per capita. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, despite the fact that it is difficult to make it through a day without breaking one of the country's many laws. BrightonBurg's national animal is the Wild Boar, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Orange Catholic.

BrightonBurg is ranked 135,353^rd in the world and 49^th in One big Island for Highest Crime Rates, with 1.93 Crimes Per Hour.