The United States of Teapeneion is a colossal, genial nation, ruled by Vladimir Marx Engels Lenin with an even hand, and notable for its pith helmet sales, smutty television, and ubiquitous missile silos. The compassionate, democratic population of 7.097 billion Teapeneionians enjoy extensive civil rights and enjoy a level of social equality free from the usual accompanying government corruption.

The enormous, liberal, socially-minded government juggles the competing demands of Education, Administration, and Healthcare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Leningrad. The average income tax rate is 94.1%.

The frighteningly efficient Teapeneionian economy, worth 886 trillion New Credits a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is highly specialized, is mostly made up of the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Trout Farming, Arms Manufacturing, and Book Publishing. Average income is an impressive 124,866 New Credits, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Builders across Teapeneion are blocked up with orders for new public loos, people stand their fridges back-to-front to benefit from the free heating, physics lessons mostly involve talking about emotional management techniques, and a passport is literally priceless. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Teapeneion's national animal is the Bear, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Teapeneion is ranked 5,834^th in the world and 1^st in The Apolean Frontiers for Nicest Citizens, with 44.42 average smiles per day.