The Fake Prayers of Eight Hippopotamuses is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by Heavy Henry with an even hand, and notable for its infamous sell-swords, smutty television, and complete absence of social welfare. The hard-nosed, hard-working, democratic, humorless population of 22.532 billion Fake Hippo worshippers have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

The medium-sized, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Administration, Education, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Fake Hippo Cathedral. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 4.7%.

The frighteningly efficient Faker than a holy Hippo economy, worth a remarkable 6,383 trillion Fake Hippo Prayers a year, is fairly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with major contributions from Tourism, Information Technology, and Retail. Black market activity is extensive. Average income is an amazing 283,324 Fake Hippo Prayers, but there is a significant disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 941,445 per year while the poor average 63,587, a ratio of 14.8 to 1.

The people's love for Heavy Henry is little more than self-preservation, cigarettes are dead-cheap, police officers ride the swiftest Fake Holy Hippos, and the line of royal succession just experienced a hardware interrupt. Crime is all-pervasive, perhaps because of the country's complete lack of prisons. Eight Hippopotamuses's national animal is the Fake Holy Hippo, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Fake Hippo Faith.

Eight Hippopotamuses is ranked 293,941^st in the world and 103^rd in Yggdrasil for Lowest Crime Rates, with 2.76 law-abiding acts per hour.