The Kingdom of Cheeseland Land of Cheese is a massive, socially progressive nation, ruled by Mr Not Justa Cow with a fair hand, and notable for its frequent executions, irreverence towards religion, and stringent health and safety legislation. The compassionate, democratic population of 1.585 billion Cheeseans are free to do what they want with their own bodies, and vote for whomever they like in elections; if they go into business, however, they are regulated to within an inch of their lives.

The large, socially-minded government juggles the competing demands of Education, Healthcare, and Administration. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Cow Town. The average income tax rate is 69.1%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The sizeable but sluggish Cheeselandian economy, worth 50.1 trillion Cheeses a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is fairly diversified, is led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Basket Weaving, Book Publishing, and Pizza Delivery. Average income is 31,608 Cheeses, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Bored politicians often entertain themselves with games of Simon during important votes, disgruntled jocks are forced to play tetris for entertainment, high school boys are required to pass vigorous self-mastery and sensitivity training to graduate, and Tom and Jerry cartoons have cat and mouse resolving their problems with reasoned discussion. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Cheeseland Land of Cheese's national animal is the Dairy Cow, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Cheeseland Land of Cheese is ranked 15,791^st in the world and 848^th in Balder for Most Cheerful Citizens, with 53.84 Percentage Of Water Glasses Perceived Half-Full.