The Former Oasirican Republic of Ossidiacqua is a gargantuan, orderly nation, ruled by Grand High Cardinal Giocomo Re with an iron fist, and renowned for its ban on automobiles, frequent executions, and anti-smoking policies. The cynical population of 11.208 billion Acquans are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

The large, corrupt, well-organized government prioritizes Education, with Environment, Social Policy, and Spirituality also on the agenda. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Sant'Elia. The average income tax rate is 56.2%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The strong Acquan economy, worth 809 trillion Obts a year, is led by the Book Publishing industry, with major contributions from Tourism, Soda Sales, and Cheese Exports. Black market activity is frequent. Average income is 72,206 Obts, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

A survey of the nation's rivers and children has shown that pesticide levels are at an all-time regional high, the nation's secret service is so secret that nobody knows if it has one, suppression of pro-democracy protests is a daily occurrence, and police and sick people alike fear the Day of Rest as all institutions are forced to shut down. Crime is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Ossidiacqua's national animal is the Gerenuk, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

Ossidiacqua is ranked 5,298^th in the world and 21^st in Rushmore for Most Valuable International Artwork, with zero Bank.