The Free Land of Richie Valens is a gargantuan, socially progressive nation, remarkable for its barren, inhospitable landscape, otherworldly petting zoo, and zero percent divorce rate. The hard-nosed population of 15.263 billion Richie Valensians have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

The large government prioritizes Defense, although Law & Order, Healthcare, and Welfare are also considered important. The average income tax rate is 59.9%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The large but inefficient Richie Valensian economy, worth 649 trillion Dollars a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is broadly diversified, is led by the Beef-Based Agriculture industry, with major contributions from Pizza Delivery, Uranium Mining, and Woodchip Exports. Average income is 42,543 Dollars, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.6 times as much as the poorest.

Rag-wearing teachers are often mistaken for homeless people, prime picnicking sites are being paved over in the name of progress, the upper class have been throwing riots after hunting was recently banned, and it's considered a civil right to be allowed to neglect and mistreat your own children. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Richie Valens's national animal is the Roadie, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation.

Richie Valens is ranked 72,976^th in the world and 1,405^th in Suspicious for Most Armed, with 0.99 weapons per person.