The Rogue Nation of Dark Estonia is a huge, safe nation, notable for its parental licensing program, prohibition of alcohol, and frequent executions. The hard-nosed, cynical population of 516 million Dark Estonians are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The large, corrupt, socially-minded, well-organized government prioritizes Defense, although Law & Order, Education, and Administration are also considered important, while Spirituality and International Aid receive no funds. The average income tax rate is 44.2%, but much higher for the wealthy.

The sizeable but inefficient Dark Estonian economy, worth 21.7 trillion bags a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is a slick, highly efficient, broadly diversified black market in Uranium Mining, Basket Weaving, Door-to-door Insurance Sales, and Information Technology. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is 42,134 bags, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

The Pipe Bomb Makers' Pop-Up Book can be found in preschool libraries, intellectual snobbery has the cognoscenti sneering at anyone who doesn't have an opinion on the semiological drift of Umberto Eco's works, Leader claims tax rises are the result of 'curses', and jollity-related fatalities are on the increase. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Dark Estonia's national animal is the Bullet Tooth Lion, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation.

Dark Estonia is ranked 220,852^nd in the world and 5,026^th in The North Pacific for Most Cheerful Citizens, with 49.01 Percentage Of Water Glasses Perceived Half-Full.