The Awkward Adages of Geektopia is a gargantuan, cultured nation, ruled by Nijchhōh I with an even hand, and renowned for its closed borders, smutty television, and keen interest in outer space. The hard-nosed, hard-working, humorless, devout population of 11.643 billion Kwandoites have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

The medium-sized, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Industry, Administration, and Law & Order. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Mordecai. The average income tax rate is 96.6%.

The frighteningly efficient Geektopian economy, worth a remarkable 4,327 trillion cryptos a year, is fairly diversified and mostly comprised of black market activity, especially in Information Technology, Retail, Woodchip Exports, and Book Publishing. Average income is an amazing 371,678 cryptos, with the richest citizens earning 8.0 times as much as the poorest.

The most commonly-worn shoes are concrete ones, young people devote their entire lives to the faith, calling tech support mid-shootout is a common occurrence, and there's a literal nanny state for the legions of children taken by social services. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Geektopia's national animal is the ass, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation, and its national religion is Math.

Geektopia is ranked 292,781^st in the world and 1,268^th in Europeia for Most Armed, with 0.12 weapons per person.