The Confederacy of Ump367 is a massive, orderly nation, notable for its ubiquitous missile silos, enslaved workforce, and smutty television. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless, devout population of 4.789 billion Ump367ians are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The medium-sized, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Law & Order, Defense, and Education. The average income tax rate is 82.4%.

The frighteningly efficient Ump367ian economy, worth 953 trillion Platinums a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is an enormous, deeply entrenched, fairly diversified black market in Arms Manufacturing, Information Technology, Woodchip Exports, and Basket Weaving. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an impressive 199,108 Platinums, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 3.7 times as much as the poorest.

Teachers are dying as they attempt to read 500 word essays without pausing for breath, Ump367ian novella fans become unusually flustered when thinking about Leader, the government tells its citizens to 'forgive and forget', and even doll houses and dog kennels have to be able to withstand rigorous earthquake testing. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Ump367's national animal is the Wolf, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

Ump367 is ranked 280,904^th in the world and 10,305^th in Osiris for Most Cheerful Citizens, with 28.28 Percentage Of Water Glasses Perceived Half-Full.