The Salt King of Tim-Opolis is a gargantuan, orderly nation, ruled by Tim Stark with an iron fist, and remarkable for its frequent executions, sprawling nuclear power plants, and spontaneously combusting cars. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless population of 19.985 billion Northerners are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The medium-sized, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Education. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Winterfell. The average income tax rate is 95.1%.

The powerhouse Tim-Opolisian economy, worth a remarkable 5,279 trillion Crowns a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Uranium Mining, Information Technology, and Woodchip Exports. Black market activity is frequent. Average income is an amazing 264,164 Crowns, but there is a large disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 996,573 per year while the poor average 48,773, a ratio of 20.4 to 1.

The nation operates a "finders-keepers" policy with other nations' citizens, patriots insist that size does matter, giggling teens are asked to put their mouths on rubber dolls, and wanting a better life for your child is prohibited by a clause in the criminal code. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Tim-Opolis's national animal is the Direwolf, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Adjeism.

Tim-Opolis is ranked 1,469^th in the world and 3^rd in Spiritus for Most Advanced Defense Forces, scoring 22,763.11 on the Total War Preparedness Rating.