The Holy Lucky Pink Christmas of Woodlands is a huge, efficient nation, renowned for its museums and concert halls, anti-smoking policies, and multi-spousal wedding ceremonies. The compassionate, democratic population of 693 million Cyrinics are free to do what they want with their own bodies, and vote for whomever they like in elections; if they go into business, however, they are regulated to within an inch of their lives.

The large, liberal government juggles the competing demands of Education, Industry, and Healthcare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Murky Camp Harbour. The average income tax rate is 77.1%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Cyrinic economy, worth 92.8 trillion gold bars a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is broadly diversified, is dominated by the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Tourism, Book Publishing, and Retail. Average income is an impressive 133,972 gold bars, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

The nation is weighing the price of victory following a nuclear strike, students consistently complain that the wi-fi ate their homework, programmes of questionable content are shown at peak-hours, and science centers and state of the art laboratories are ubiquitous. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown. Woodlands's national animal is the Rudolph bat, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies.

Woodlands is ranked 17,483^rd in the world and 339^th in Europe for Most Beautiful Environments, with 1,118.56 pounds of wildlife per square mile.