The Awkward Adages of Geektopia is a titanic, cultured nation, ruled by Nijchhōh I with an even hand, and renowned for its deadly medical pandemics, frequent executions, and keen interest in outer space. The hard-nosed, humorless, devout population of 15.146 billion Kwandoites are highly moralistic and fiercely conservative, in the sense that they tend to believe most things should be outlawed. People who have good jobs and work quietly at them are lauded; others are viewed with suspicion.

The medium-sized, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Industry, Administration, and Law & Order. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Mordecai. The average income tax rate is 98.1%.

The frighteningly efficient Geektopian economy, worth a remarkable 6,382 trillion cryptos a year, is broadly diversified and mostly comprised of black market activity, especially in Information Technology, Retail, Woodchip Exports, and Book Publishing. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is an amazing 421,411 cryptos, with the richest citizens earning 6.0 times as much as the poorest.

Drills and shovels have been banned as the government cracks down on any means of fracking, arbitration is mightier than the sword, a favorite "life hack" for gap year backpackers is to pretend to be homeless for government handouts, and the nation is famous for bravely sending wave after wave of its soldiers until the enemy runs out of bullets. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Geektopia's national animal is the ass, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation, and its national religion is Math.

Geektopia is ranked 9,808^th in the world and 566^th in Osiris for Most Eco-Friendly Governments, scoring 5,608.64 on the Dolphin Recycling Awareness Index.