The Rich playground and poor hel of Cawn is a massive, efficient nation, ruled by Big rich man with an iron fist, and notable for its teetotalling pirates, parental licensing program, and ritual sacrifices. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless population of 1.329 billion Rij are ruled with an iron fist by the corrupt, dictatorship government, which oppresses anyone who isn't on the board of a Fortune 500 company. Large corporations tend to be above the law, and use their financial clout to gain ever-increasing government benefits at the expense of the poor and unemployed.

The tiny, corrupt, moralistic, pro-business, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Industry, and Law & Order. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Rich city. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 4.4%.

The frighteningly efficient Richmë economy, worth 229 trillion marks a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Retail industry, with major contributions from Arms Manufacturing, Gambling, and Uranium Mining. Black market activity is notable. Average income is an impressive 172,579 marks, but there is a vast disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 1,300,178 per year while the poor average 6,525, a ratio of 199 to 1.

The military has gone fission for more funding, the navy's new flotilla is gonna be a thrilla, chicken farmers must rise before the sun every day to gag their cockerels, and colonies are told they'll get their sovereignty back when they finish supper. Crime is pervasive, perhaps because of the country's complete lack of prisons. Cawn's national animal is the ⠀⠀, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

Cawn is ranked 25,065^th in the world and 211^th in the Rejected Realms for Most Conservative, scoring 81.75 on the Bush-Santorum Dawning Terror Index.