The Republic of Kalilola is a colossal, safe nation, ruled by Egor from New-Kaminola with an even hand, and remarkable for its aversion to nipples, ban on automobiles, and irreverence towards religion. The compassionate, hard-working population of 5.344 billion Kalilolans have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

The medium-sized, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Education, Administration, and Defense. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of New-Kaminola. The average income tax rate is 71.8%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Kalilolan economy, worth 687 trillion Kalolian hryvnias a year, is fairly diversified and led by the Tourism industry, with significant contributions from Information Technology, Book Publishing, and Arms Manufacturing. Average income is an impressive 128,710 Kalolian hryvnias, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Urban high-volume mailers now receive their mail via chauffeur-driven limousines, the atmosphere in Kalilolan boardrooms is turning more gay, t-shirts displaying a photo of Egor from New-Kaminola performing the Full-Monty are selling out, and streakers swamp all public events in order to bare it all. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Kalilola's national animal is the kangaroo, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Kalilola is ranked 13,259^th in the world and 375^th in the South Pacific for Most Cheerful Citizens, with 54.3 Percentage Of Water Glasses Perceived Half-Full.