The Sharp Red Agony of Zahnschmerzen is a gargantuan, safe nation, ruled by Sweet Tooth the Grimacing Man with an even hand, and renowned for its ban on automobiles, devotion to social welfare, and stringent health and safety legislation. The hard-nosed, democratic population of 12.36 billion Zahnschmerzenians are fiercely patriotic and enjoy great social equality; they tend to view other, more capitalist countries as somewhat immoral and corrupt.

The medium-sized, socially-minded government juggles the competing demands of Administration, Law & Order, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Trockenheim. The average income tax rate is 70.0%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Zahnschmerzenian economy, worth a remarkable 1,565 trillion Zahns a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector is led by the Tourism industry, with significant contributions from Retail, Information Technology, and Book Publishing. Average income is an impressive 126,646 Zahns, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

A vast monorail network carries people all over the country, atheistic refugees haven't got a prayer of being granted asylum, the people are famous throughout the region for their perfect yellow teeth, and children gain their first sex education from reading the dictionary. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Zahnschmerzen's national animal is the Tooth Fairy, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies, and its national religion is Hygienic Dental Devotion.

Zahnschmerzen is ranked 14,258^th in the world and 974^th in Lazarus for Highest Poor Incomes, with 107,324.37 Standard Monetary Units.