The Holy Empire of Mimpinesia is a gargantuan, cultured nation, ruled by Sergei Andreyev with an even hand, and renowned for its museums and concert halls, otherworldly petting zoo, and parental licensing program. The compassionate, democratic, humorless, devout population of 20.304 billion Mimpinesians have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

The medium-sized government juggles the competing demands of Education, Administration, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Andreyevgrad. The average income tax rate is 99.0%.

The frighteningly efficient Mimpinesian economy, worth a remarkable 9,155 trillion Kertas Toilets a year, is broadly diversified and dominated by the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Retail, Book Publishing, and Beef-Based Agriculture. Average income is an amazing 450,921 Kertas Toilets, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 3.1 times as much as the poorest.

Soldiers find that home gadgets and power tools are more effective as improvised weapons than the guns they've been issued, the national sporting identity is represented by a talking burger and a singing smartphone, the horniness of the great-horned Doge is considered a national priority, and the government has adopted a "Lightning Never Strikes Twice" approach to dealing with natural disasters. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Mimpinesia's national animal is the Doge, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Mimpinesia is ranked 293,453^rd in the world and 7,245^th in the Rejected Realms for Most Armed, with 0.09 weapons per person.