The United Federation of Valentir is a titanic, cultured nation, ruled by William Ashton with an even hand, and renowned for its sprawling nuclear power plants, punitive income tax rates, and devotion to social welfare. The compassionate, hard-working, humorless population of 19.751 billion Valentirians have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and look forward to their next free and open election, to be held on an as-yet unannounced date.

The enormous, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Education, Law & Order, and Defense. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Valeins. The average income tax rate is 96.6%.

The frighteningly efficient Valentirian economy, worth a remarkable 2,848 trillion Dollars a year, is quite specialized and dominated by the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Tourism, Arms Manufacturing, and Uranium Mining. Average income is an impressive 144,213 Dollars, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Manufacturers of biodegradable plastics have to wait for months to show evidence of organic decomposition, hundreds of sailors ride the good ship William Ashton day after day, seats at the back of the bus are reserved for homosexuals, and Valentirians seem to be catching more chills. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Valentir's national animal is the Polar Bear, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Church of the Holy Redeemer.

Valentir is ranked 7,378^th in the world and 400^th in Balder for Most Extensive Public Healthcare, scoring 8,101.31 on the Theresa-Nightingale Rating.