The Holy Incorruptible Tsardom of TURTLESHROOM II is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by Tsars Outtacountry and Pallor and Wip with an even hand, and renowned for its museums and concert halls, complete lack of prisons, and aversion to nipples. The hard-nosed, hard-working, democratic, humorless, devout population of 25.495 billion TurtleShroomers are free to succeed or fail in life on their own merits; the successful tend to enjoy an opulent (but moralistic) lifestyle, while the failures can be seen crowding out most jails.

The relatively small, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Law & Order, Defense, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Jonesboro. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 75.9%.

The frighteningly efficient TurtleShroomian economy, worth an astonishing 17,041 trillion Scrips a year, is broadly diversified and mostly comprised of black market activity, especially in Arms Manufacturing, Retail, Beef-Based Agriculture, and Tourism. Average income is a breathtaking 668,427 Scrips, but there is a large disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 2,812,440 per year while the poor average 103,090, a ratio of 27.3 to 1.

Female smokers cut their hair and don suits to get into male-only clubs, all you have to do is pray to get into TURTLESHROOM II, the government denies that it has an agency overseeing plausible deniability of black-ops agencies, and family bonding sessions are considered immoral and are banned. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. TURTLESHROOM II's national animal is the Nangnang, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Christianity.

TURTLESHROOM II is ranked 182^nd in the world and 1^st in Valkia for Largest Insurance Industry, scoring 20,384.45 on the Risk Expulsion Effectiveness Rating.