The Regional Nation of The Northern Light is a gargantuan, orderly nation, ruled by The North Pacific Delegate with an iron fist, and remarkable for its ritual sacrifices, punitive income tax rates, and suspicion of poets. The compassionate, cynical, humorless, devout population of 26.126 billion TNPers are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The relatively small, corrupt, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Law & Order, Industry, and Defense. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Magicality City. The average income tax rate is 61.2%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Northern Lightian economy, worth a remarkable 5,414 trillion Pacific Dollars a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Information Technology, Furniture Restoration, and Woodchip Exports. Black market activity is rampant. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an amazing 207,243 Pacific Dollars, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.5 times as much as the poorest.

Access to the woods is only granted to those who bring a small shrubbery, soldiers who shoot themselves in the foot are regarded as heroes, only lightning has a chance of striking The North Pacific Delegate twice, and there's more pink stuff on sale these days. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. The Northern Light's national animal is the McMasterdonian Lion, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Flemingovianism.

The Northern Light is ranked 312,550^th in the world and 4,562^nd in The North Pacific for Largest Pizza Delivery Sector, scoring -13.08 on the Pepperoni Propulsion Productivity Index.