The Republic of Soirwren is a titanic, genial nation, renowned for its soft-spoken computers, keen interest in outer space, and absence of drug laws. The compassionate population of 17.169 billion Soirwrenians enjoy extensive civil rights and enjoy a level of social equality free from the usual accompanying government corruption.

The enormous, corrupt, socially-minded government juggles the competing demands of Education, Healthcare, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Soigné. The average income tax rate is 84.4%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Soirwrenian economy, worth a remarkable 1,589 trillion credits a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is highly specialized, is mostly made up of the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Basket Weaving. Average income is 92,557 credits, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Religious turf wars have caused frustrated police to pray for divine intervention, school lockers are filled with fancy underwear, passwords to nuclear codes must now contain upper and lower case characters, and the government's economic policy can be summed up as "Abort, Retry, Fail?". Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Soirwren's national animal is the deer, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Soirwren is ranked 29,248^th in the world and 542^nd in The East Pacific for Nicest Citizens, with 19.56 average smiles per day.