The Bar on the corner of every region Board

Brocklandia wrote:

Sounds like my last family reunion.

You have a family? And you haven't been disowned by them?

Tercania islands

Zombie Penguins wrote:

The weekend poetry contest is under way! Nuroblav wants to see poems about the moon.

*Ahem!* A poem.

I've been howling at the moon
But it has yet to howl back.

Zombie Penguins, Tercania islands, and Nuroblav

Mindon wrote:

You have a family? And you haven't been disowned by them?

Hey, even if I've been disowned, I still stay in touch with them, because:

I might need an inheritance someday.
I might need to cause that inheritance.

Tercania islands

Jehovahs witness

The Impending Doom of Zombie Penguins

The Witness stirs from their nap and slaps a piece of paper for the poetry contest onto the counter.

I once heard a tale I'll tell soon
Of the witches who hexed the moon
They went right ahead
And cursed it 'till it bled
With some whipped up eldritch rune

Now that never sits pretty well
And so unleashed the hounds o' hell
Gnashing at the bit
While said witches split
Havin' done their lunar cursin' spell

I'd also like to order some Alfred Hick's moonshine, please. As much of it as possible. I'll pay up my tab too. Hey, get over here, you.

The Witness snaps their finger and a terrified looking drone walks up from out of nowhere, who is given a bulging wallet and shoved towards the cash register of Flo.

Keep paying for drinks as long as you can, you're from one of the better batches, right? Expensive one too. I'm sure you can hold out a few hours.

Brocklandia, Zombie Penguins, and Tercania islands

Jehovahs witness wrote:

I'd also like to order some Alfred Hick's moonshine, please. As much of it as possible. I'll pay up my tab too.

*A zombie brings over a barrel of moonshine*

Brocklandia, Jehovahs witness, and Tercania islands

Jehovahs witness

The Who are you of Maple Hockey Canadia

Zombie Penguins wrote:

*A zombie brings over a barrel of moonshine*

The Witness grabs the barrel of moonshine and gives the zombie penguin a thumbs up before tilting the barrel back and starting to chug directly from the tap, all while pained sounds are coming from the direction of the drone.

Brocklandia, Zombie Penguins, and Tercania islands

A poem from up north:
Does the moon look different from Canada?
It's strange how things change as you go north.
Reflecting off the gentle snow, it takes your breath away.
I would bet the moon looks very different from Mars.
Phobos and Deimos, terror and panic. Is this the way things are?
When we escape the reality of this earth to go there someday.
Is fear and terror all we face?
Or is there something more.
Like Uranous spinning on her side like a dizzy little child turning blue.
Or Jupiter's 79 little friends.
Io, only the vowels matter.
Is that the truth?
f y rmv th cnsnnts wld y stll gt th sm rslt?
Why?
The real question is, why not?
Go beyond the horizon.
A small friend can balance your gravity, shape your seasons and drive your tides.
Don't remember. But don't forget, either.

Brocklandia, Jehovahs witness, and Tercania islands

Edited

Zombie Penguins wrote:

The weekend poetry contest is under way! Nuroblav wants to see poems about the moon.

So I was in the process of writing another poem for the poetry contest and ran the grammar checker. The checker changed one of the lines to read as follows:

Black dog sex toy

So now I can't post the poem, because that one line is so much better than the rest of it. Please accept that line as the First Place winning poem.

_{If you don't, I'll unleash my grammar checker on you.}

Zombie Penguins, Jehovahs witness, Tercania islands, and Nuroblav

Mindon

Brocklandia wrote:

Hey, even if I've been disowned, I still stay in touch with them, because:

I might need an inheritance someday.
I might need to cause that inheritance.

Ah, understandable. You never know when you might want to kill your family. Speaking of which, look what's on TV.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a9f11SgfrOA

Jehovahs witness, Tercania islands, and The Grimm Reaper

Mindon wrote:

Ah, understandable. You never know when you might want to kill your family. Speaking of which, look what's on TV.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a9f11SgfrOA

By Season 27, most shows do become a little repetitious, don't they?

Tercania islands

Jehovahs witness

The Witness finally stops chugging from the barrel and sets it down, relaxing at the counter.

More in there than it seems... And now I've thoroughly pumped myself full of moonshine, and I see that drone is long since dead. Excellent service as always.

Brocklandia wrote:

By Season 27, most shows do become a little repetitious, don't they?

Season 15 was the best one. That's when they introduced the cousin twice removed.

Zombie Penguins and Tercania islands

Puppet tyranacility

Mindon wrote:

First, I think you mean anti matter. Second, that's not a way to destroy the universe, the basic structure of it is still there, eventually some sort of anti matter big bang will occur undoing everything, mostly. Third, there is no third thing. I just said third because it sounds better.

Well first, you can collapse the universe with said structure, since it is the invisible gravity, by manipulating it to bring everything closer and cause chaos, second, the anti matter was removed in the birth of the universe, third, I have to agree with you on this point, it makes everything better for an reasonable argument

The head of trading affairs

The Planet X

Tercania islands wrote:

Well, all conversions are made by our mathematically maniacal cashier, Flo. Just try not to get too close when you pay, she might grab you. Pay with exact change by the way, she doesn't have the patience for counting coins.

Very well, Searches pockets for change,
I think this will do it although I payed alittle extra, consider it an investment for when I return.

Brocklandia wrote:

We'll give you a 50% conversion rate for the Bar. The other 50% will go to me. But don't call it a "bribe"--consider it a "processing fee."

I don't know this seems rather suspicious to me, I dont have that kind of cash.

Tercania islands

Jehovahs witness wrote:

Season 15 was the best one. That's when they introduced the cousin twice removed.

I dunno--I still prefer the dog's evil doppelgänger from the mirror dimension. When that dog married the cousin's long-lost half sister who moonlighted as an Elvis impersonator, their first litter was possessed by the devil, and the P.T.D.S made the dog go on that three-state ax murder spree, that was some quality family entertainment, I tell you.

Tercania islands

The head of trading affairs wrote:

I don't know this seems rather suspicious to me, I dont have that kind of cash.

Sigh. No one does. Buncha deadbeats--that's what our customers are.

The head of trading affairs

Jehovahs witness

Brocklandia wrote:

I dunno--I still prefer the dog's evil doppelgänger from the mirror dimension. When that dog married the cousin's long-lost half sister who moonlighted as an Elvis impersonator, their first litter was possessed by the devil, and the P.T.D.S made the dog go on that three-state ax murder spree, that was some quality family entertainment, I tell you.

I didn't like that last arc, it made light of P.T.D.S. TV colors perceptions and not not all P.T.D.S. sufferers go on ax murder sprees, only 30% of them, statistically. Shame about what the other 60% also get up to though.

Jehovahs witness wrote:

I didn't like that last arc, it made light of P.T.D.S. TV colors perceptions and not not all P.T.D.S. sufferers go on ax murder sprees, only 30% of them, statistically. Shame about what the other 60% also get up to though.

True, but all the colors and flashing lights and flashbacks caused about 45.7% of the viewership to have epileptic convulsions, and those are always fun to watch.

Puppet tyranacility wrote:

Well first, you can collapse the universe with said structure, since it is the invisible gravity, by manipulating it to bring everything closer and cause chaos, second, the anti matter was removed in the birth of the universe, third, I have to agree with you on this point, it makes everything better for an reasonable argument

So you're saying quantum physics and the expanding universe theory would be easier to understand if everything was made of lemon-lime flavored Kool-Aid? Well, how do you know it isn't?

Starving artist

Art

Hello friends. It’s been some time since I last had a drink. Oh how I miss the good times — the Bartwork contest, poetry, and my good friend Lake of fur

How are things here?

Songs you dont understand

The SociallyAwkward Bar Waitress of Arcticfoxxo

Can I replace Lake of fur?

Here, some song:

aNi Tamrazyan - Life is Amazing
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=ghpEhIeCTHs

The SociallyAwkward Bar Waitress of Arcticfoxxo

East lodge wrote:

*cries*

Can I posses you? UwU
I wuv you

possibly

The Dont drink cheap wine of Drunkndisorderly

Brocklandia wrote:

The obvious solution is to call it something other than "death penalty." Perhaps you're initiating a "corporeal liberation campaign" for criminals?

nah I call it the police gang mugging

The SociallyAwkward Bar Waitress of Arcticfoxxo

Edited

The Moon stares in silence at the cities below
pondering the lights which dim its glow
They do not know the glory in me
nor do they want to see
Perhaps I will ask the sun
and see what she has done
' Man do not forsake nature
for it is that which to you natures

( this was submitted over 3 years ago here, so here it is again)

Brocklandia and Duncan the delivery doggo

Drunkndisorderly wrote:

The Moon stares in silence at the cities below
pondering the lights which dim its glow
They do not know the glory in me
nor do they want to see
Perhaps I will ask the sun
and see what she has done
' Man do not forsake nature
for it is that which to you natures

( this was submitted over 3 years ago here, so here it is again)

*opens window and throws rock at the moon* STOP GLARING AT US YOU CREEP

Duncan the delivery doggo

East lodge