The Kingdom of Tai Pei is a colossal, genial nation, ruled by Prime Minister with an even hand, and notable for its prohibition of alcohol, anti-smoking policies, and parental licensing program. The compassionate population of 8.525 billion Tai Peians are fiercely patriotic and enjoy great social equality; they tend to view other, more capitalist countries as somewhat immoral and corrupt.

The enormous, socially-minded government juggles the competing demands of Education, Healthcare, and Environment. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Xinhai. The average income tax rate is 95.7%.

The frighteningly efficient Tai Peian economy, worth a remarkable 1,129 trillion Xins a year, is highly specialized and mostly made up of the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Arms Manufacturing. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 132,502 Xins, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

News headlines usually include p-values, citizens are expected to be proficient in at least five languages, genocide is seen as a topic best avoided in history lessons, and the government has pinkie-promised never to use its veto power except in an emergency. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Tai Pei's national animal is the Peregrine Falcon, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies, and its national religion is Astralism.

Tai Pei is ranked 292,253^rd in the world and 2^nd in The Celtic Order for Most Armed, with 0.11 weapons per person.