The Subsidized Union of Jermi is a colossal, orderly nation, ruled by J with an iron fist, and remarkable for its strictly enforced bedtime, infamous sell-swords, and stringent health and safety legislation. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless, devout population of 5.335 billion Jermen are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

The large, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Administration, Education, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Jeinburg. The average income tax rate is 92.5%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Jermian economy, worth a remarkable 1,408 trillion Mincoes a year, is fairly diversified and mostly comprised of black market activity, especially in Information Technology, Arms Manufacturing, Soda Sales, and Book Publishing. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is an amazing 264,019 Mincoes, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

International terrorists often get their weapons supply in Jermi, J reduces citizens' commute times by giving away their homes, citizens can be frequently spotted going about their business stark naked, and crimes are difficult to stop as most of the police force is stuck in traffic. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown. Jermi's national animal is the dolphin, which frolics freely in the nation's sparkling oceans, and its national religion is Lunaism.

Jermi is ranked 39,015^th in the world and 12^th in Palatine for Lowest Crime Rates, with 78.11 law-abiding acts per hour.