The Grand Duchy of Iantopiia is a colossal, cultured nation, ruled by Ianvorli Ianhorn with an iron fist, and renowned for its rum-swilling pirates, strictly enforced bedtime, and pith helmet sales. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless population of 5.125 billion Iantopiians are ruled with an iron fist by the dictatorship government, which ensures that no-one outside the party gets too rich. In their personal lives, however, citizens are relatively unoppressed; it remains to be seen whether this is because the government genuinely cares about its people, or if it hasn't gotten around to stamping out civil rights yet.

The medium-sized, corrupt, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Healthcare, and Administration. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Ianopolis. The average income tax rate is 95.3%.

The frighteningly efficient Iantopiian economy, worth a remarkable 1,597 trillion ITDS a year, is mostly comprised of black market activity, especially in Arms Manufacturing, Tourism, Information Technology, and Book Publishing. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an amazing 311,699 ITDS, with the richest citizens earning 6.8 times as much as the poorest.

Children as young as twelve are conscripted into the armed forces, marijuana is legal in the privacy of your own home, young and brooding teens are welcomed with open arms to the Dogwarts School of Strangeness and Sorcery, and the blind lead the blind in social welfare. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Iantopiia's national animal is the Narwhal, which frolics freely in the nation's sparkling oceans.

Iantopiia is ranked 269,361^st in the world and 28^th in The Maritimes for Safest, scoring 10.59 on the Bubble-Rapp Safety Rating.