by Max Barry

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Largest Welfare Programs: 2,592ndHighest Foreign Aid Spending: 3,858thMost Devout: 5,282nd
The Lýderal Dáxlamic Metropolis of
Corrupt Dictatorship
Faith won't fail!
Influence
Shoeshiner
Region
Civil Rights
Below Average
Economy
All-Consuming
Political Freedom
Few

Overview Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards

First Parish

Population14.731 billion

CapitalFirst Parish
LeaderLýderis Bradford John
FaithDáxlam

CurrencyDáxlamic Mark
AnimalJumping Fox

The Lýderal Dáxlamic Metropolis of First Parish is a titanic, cultured nation, ruled by Lýderis Bradford John with an iron fist, and remarkable for its prohibition of alcohol, state-planned economy, and stringent health and safety legislation. The compassionate, cynical, devout population of 14.731 billion First Parishioners are ruled with an iron fist by the dictatorship government, which ensures that no-one outside the party gets too rich. In their personal lives, however, citizens are relatively unoppressed; it remains to be seen whether this is because the government genuinely cares about its people, or if it hasn't gotten around to stamping out civil rights yet.

The enormous, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Education, Welfare, and Healthcare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of First Parish. The average income tax rate is 91.1%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The all-consuming First Parishian economy, worth a remarkable 1,571 trillion Dáxlamic Marks a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector is led by the Tourism industry, with significant contributions from Book Publishing, Information Technology, and Cheese Exports. Average income is an impressive 106,664 Dáxlamic Marks, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Search-and-rescue organisations are the biggest employer in the country, census workers struggle to account for the rapidly increasing number of citizens to tabulate, the number of eyes rolled per maths lesson is increasing exponentially, and sales of superhero insurance have skyrocketed after the government abandoned the police in favor of vigilantes. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown. First Parish's national animal is the Jumping Fox, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Dáxlam.

First Parish is ranked 276,825th in the world and 101st in Declansburg for Largest Manufacturing Sector, scoring 2,423.66 on the Gooback-Jerbs Productivity Index.

Top
1%
Largest Welfare Programs: 2,592ndTop
5%
Highest Foreign Aid Spending: 3,858thMost Devout: 5,282ndMost Compassionate Citizens: 5,332ndNicest Citizens: 5,715thMost Advanced Public Transport: 6,162ndMost Pacifist: 6,344thMost Accessible: 6,671stMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 7,451stMost Inclusive: 8,232ndHighest Average Tax Rates: 8,803rdMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 9,905thMost Advanced Public Education: 11,176thMost Cultured: 11,443rdHighest Food Quality: 11,606thLargest Publishing Industry: 11,855thMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 13,311thMost Cheerful Citizens: 14,493rdMost Beautiful Environments: 15,284thTop
10%
Most Popular Tourist Destinations: 17,508thLargest Governments: 17,562ndLongest Average Lifespans: 20,705thHighest Poor Incomes: 21,305thHighest Economic Output: 22,429thMost Income Equality: 26,885thLargest Populations: 30,901stMost World Assembly Endorsements: 30,965thLowest Crime Rates: 32,438th
Top
5%
Largest Welfare Programs: 6th in the regionHighest Foreign Aid Spending: 8th in the regionTop
10%
Most Devout: 10th in the regionMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 12th in the regionMost Pacifist: 13th in the regionMost Compassionate Citizens: 14th in the regionMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 14th in the regionNicest Citizens: 16th in the regionMost Advanced Public Transport: 16th in the regionLargest Populations: 16th in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : First Parish was ranked in the Top 10% of the world for Lowest Crime Rates.
  • : First Parish was ranked in the Top 10% of the world for Largest Populations.
  • : First Parish was ranked in the Top 10% of the world for Largest Populations.
  • : First Parish was ranked in the Top 10% of the world for Largest Populations.
  • : First Parish was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Most Politically Apathetic Citizens.
  • : First Parish's influence in Declansburg rose from "Zero" to "Shoeshiner".
  • : First Parish relocated from Lazarus to Declansburg.
  • : Following new legislation in First Parish, sales of superhero insurance have skyrocketed after the government abandoned the police in favor of vigilantes.
  • : Following new legislation in First Parish, the number of eyes rolled per maths lesson is increasing exponentially.
  • : Following new legislation in First Parish, census workers struggle to account for the rapidly increasing number of citizens to tabulate.

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