The Grand Duchy of Caestert is a titanic, efficient nation, notable for its disturbing lack of elderly people, ritual sacrifices, and stringent health and safety legislation. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless, devout population of 10.234 billion Caestertians are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The relatively small, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Education, Law & Order, and Defense. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 32.5%.

The frighteningly efficient Caestertian economy, worth a remarkable 1,401 trillion golds a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Information Technology, Beef-Based Agriculture, and Woodchip Exports. Black market activity is extensive. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 136,964 golds, with the richest citizens earning 6.9 times as much as the poorest.

The sudden rash of anti-drug laws has left everyone dazed and confused, there is one competing standard, the nation's laws on image rights are amongst the strictest in the world, and the air force's greatness is based on how many enemies are made during procurement. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Caestert's national animal is the Cow, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Caestert is ranked 252,479^th in the world and 7^th in The Great Chili for Largest Pizza Delivery Sector, scoring -6.61 on the Pepperoni Propulsion Productivity Index.