The Tanning Bed of Bronze Age Pervert is a huge, orderly nation, renowned for its barren, inhospitable landscape, compulsory military service, and complete absence of social welfare. The hard-working, cynical, devout population of 874 million Bronze Age Pervertians are proud of their wide-ranging civil freedoms, and those who aren't tend to be dragged off the streets by men in dark suits and hustled into cars with tinted windows.

The relatively small, liberal, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Spirituality, Defense, and Administration. The average income tax rate is 10.0%.

The Bronze Age Pervertian economy, worth 42.5 trillion Drachmas a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Retail industry, with major contributions from Arms Manufacturing, Woodchip Exports, and Information Technology. Average income is 48,636 Drachmas, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 3.9 times as much as the poorest.

The government's religious works are headed by a New Age guru and some say Leader has gone MAD after authorizing the development of apocalyptic biological weapons. Crime is moderate, with the police force struggling against a lack of funding and a high mortality rate. Bronze Age Pervert's national animal is the Body Builder, which can occasionally be seen sifting through garbage in the nation's cities.

Bronze Age Pervert is ranked 87,061^st in the world and 5^th in The Mausoleum for Fattest Citizens, with 11.77 Obesity Rate.