The Glorious Peoples' Republic of Khalite is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by Father with an even hand, and renowned for its otherworldly petting zoo, ubiquitous missile silos, and punitive income tax rates. The hard-nosed, hard-working, humorless population of 31.662 billion Khalite have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

The medium-sized, corrupt government prioritizes Defense, although Education, Industry, and Law & Order are also considered important, while Spirituality receives no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Janjing. The income tax rate is 100%.

The frighteningly efficient Khalite economy, worth an astonishing 22,500 trillion woolongs a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Arms Manufacturing and Uranium Mining. Black market activity is rampant. Average income is a breathtaking 710,661 woolongs, with the richest citizens earning 6.8 times as much as the poorest.

One can walk from one side of Janjing to the other without setting foot on Khalite soil, parents often ask to see a credit report before lending money to their own children, Khalite Barrier Island residents anxiously await their 'Bridge to Somewhere', and students are explicitly allowed to write answers on their forearms before exams. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Khalite's national animal is the bearcat, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

Khalite is ranked 313,544^th in the world and 157^th in Commonwealth of Sovereign States for Highest Drug Use, scoring 0.36 on the Pineapple Fondness Rating.