The Federal Republic of Calva is a gargantuan, cultured nation, ruled by Virginia Rodopoulos with an even hand, and renowned for its smutty television, ubiquitous missile silos, and daily referendums. The compassionate, hard-working, democratic, cheerful population of 28.138 billion Calvans enjoy extensive civil freedoms, particularly in social issues, while business tends to be more regulated.

The medium-sized, liberal government juggles the competing demands of Education, Industry, and Environment. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Agios Górtyna. The average income tax rate is 95.6%.

The frighteningly efficient Calvan economy, worth a remarkable 6,221 trillion Goas a year, is quite specialized and led by the Tourism industry, with significant contributions from Information Technology, Book Publishing, and Cheese Exports. Average income is an amazing 221,120 Goas, with the richest citizens earning 9.8 times as much as the poorest.

Voters must decide whether to go number one or number two, government election advice reads like a restaurant menu, entomologists flock to Agios Górtyna for its remarkable gadfly population, and stocks go up when the internet says so. Crime is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Calva's national animal is the Bear, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Greek Orthodox.

Calva is ranked 41,428^th in the world and 65^th in The Glorious Nations of Iwaku for Highest Poor Incomes, with 63,194.64 Standard Monetary Units.