How Finlarvat came to be - an account by President Mattia Hokkinen

Finlarvat was started as a coalition of disgruntled Finns (and perhaps the odd Swede, too), taking up the name as an acronym: FINnish Liberation And Reunification, Viz. Another Territory (they refused to talk about the Swedes for fear of persecution, or otherwise yours truly, President of Finlarvat Mattia Hokkinen, would be the President of Finlarvis!) The movement was started in 2012, with proposals for a united nation seeking independence from the EU, with exactly the kind of plans that would lead to popular support over here and overseas, and with widespread support. The rallies gathered, a few government workers were killed in people we discredited from our movement, and so the governments caved in - Sweden's in the wake of the Riksdag election in September 2014, and Finland in a statement in November, under the understanding that, if one failed, the other would not count (if the first failed, the other would not take place). The largely peaceful movement had started to gain momentum, and it now had half a year to build on it.

The referenda were due to take place on the 19th of April 2015, on the same day as the Finnish election to (and I quote future Minister of Foreign Affairs Mikael Litannen) "shoot the fox and then give our hens and chicks, divided and yet together, their own coop!" (One major Finnish tabloid interpreted this as meaning "We will kill the soldiers to give us a coup, and then a world free of the EU!", which led them to oppose independence.) The question was "Should this area of your country recieve an independent country, to be shared by the adjacent area of [Sweden/Finland]?" (it depended on where you were voting), and opinion polls consistently showed a 55-45 lead in favour of YES. So, what came of the referenda? There were 5 million eligible to vote, of which 4.4 million actually did. In Sweden, 1.9 million voted, with 1.05 million voting "Yes" (55.26%). Meanwhile, in Finland, 2.5 million voted, with 1.4 million voting "YES" (56%). We had done it! Independence at last, by exactly the margin they thought! Was failing to get sleep that night fair compensation for learning about our independence in front of our very eyes? Looking back, I made the right call when the polls closed at 10pm (or, if you were Swedish, 11pm).

Independence Day - Finlarvat's National Day - was set for the 7th of August 2016. Lots of arrangements had to be made: the political situation (no EU for us, and plans for us to use the Euro fell through, hence the Finlarvatian Mark, which converts at 4.30 Euros for your mark as I write); and full independence from both governments), time zones (one-and-a-half hours ahead of Greenwich, as a compromise), the flag (a flag based on compromise and geography), etc. After elections were held on the 17th of June 2016, I was elected President for the next three years for the Moderate Left Party, the MLP (I am officially entitled to serve three terms; I shall write a further article about our politics in a few days). Over the next three years, I hope to serve you appropriately. In our first day so far, we've seen 500 humans being cloned as part of a university trial, excessively extreme political movements banned, the car industry and the education sector recieve governmental support - but on the other side, the poorer parts of the country are now no-go zones (remember to pray to God before you head off between any two towns in the far north), and there are protests in the streets right now according to some sources, allegedly due to "discrimination", although I deny those allegations. It's early days yet, however, but this is just the beginning of Finlarvat's story.

Mattia Hokkinen, President of the Republic of Finlarvat (MLP)
Finished at 3:21am Finlarvat time; 8th August 2016