The Republic of Xfzxf is a massive, safe nation, notable for its anti-smoking policies, avowedly heterosexual populace, and absence of drug laws. The hard-nosed, hard-working, humorless, devout population of 2.26 billion Xfzxfians are highly moralistic and fiercely conservative, in the sense that they tend to believe most things should be outlawed. People who have good jobs and work quietly at them are lauded; others are viewed with suspicion.

The medium-sized, corrupt, moralistic government juggles the competing demands of Industry, Law & Order, and Education. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 57.7%.

The frighteningly efficient Xfzxfian economy, worth 264 trillion xzjfs a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Retail industry, with major contributions from Information Technology, Book Publishing, and Automobile Manufacturing. Black market activity is frequent. Average income is an impressive 116,834 xzjfs, but there is a significant disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 338,364 per year while the poor average 31,969, a ratio of 10.6 to 1.

Mountain rescue missions can end with more people lost than found, the government says that Possession is nine-tenths of the Lore, the government is pouring funds into the nation's welfare system, and Xfzxfians are regularly fired for looking at MyFace during their lunch breaks. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Xfzxf's national animal is the xzjf, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation.

Xfzxf is ranked 267,235^th in the world and 481^st in Two for Most Cheerful Citizens, with 40.13 Percentage Of Water Glasses Perceived Half-Full.