The Grand Duchy of Valni is a gargantuan, cultured nation, ruled by Ashnard with an iron fist, and renowned for its otherworldly petting zoo, infamous sell-swords, and digital currency. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless population of 13.526 billion Valnians are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

The medium-sized, corrupt, well-organized government prioritizes Defense, although Industry, Education, and Welfare are also considered important. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Nevassa. The average income tax rate is 71.0%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Valnian economy, worth a remarkable 2,171 trillion subhuman pelts a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Tourism industry, with major contributions from Information Technology, Arms Manufacturing, and Retail. Black market activity is rampant. Average income is an impressive 160,546 subhuman pelts, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.3 times as much as the poorest.

Doctors prescribe medicines but they rarely dispense hope or compassion, citizens are barcoded to keep track of their movements, immigrant herding has become a national pastime, and more sidewalk is dedicated to animals than people. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Valni's national animal is the enslaved subhuman, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is pulling yourself up by your bootstraps.

Valni is ranked 256,049^th in the world and 4,513^th in The East Pacific for Most Cheerful Citizens, with 43.9 Percentage Of Water Glasses Perceived Half-Full.