The Matriarchy of Ump447 is a massive, orderly nation, notable for its enslaved workforce, ritual sacrifices, and frequent executions. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless, devout population of 4.805 billion Ump447ians are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

The medium-sized, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Administration. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 73.1%.

The frighteningly efficient Ump447ian economy, worth 929 trillion Dollars a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is an enormous, deeply entrenched, fairly diversified black market in Arms Manufacturing, Information Technology, Uranium Mining, and Furniture Restoration. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an impressive 193,460 Dollars, with the richest citizens earning 6.7 times as much as the poorest.

Forest fires have dropped dramatically as there are hardly any forests left, the roads are notorious throughout the region for their peril, the Ministry of Health has reported a sharp increase in the incidence of delayed menopause, and Leader's family members carry literal get-out-of-jail-free cards. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Ump447's national animal is the Giraffe, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation.

Ump447 is ranked 7,913^th in the world and 643^rd in Lazarus for Most Corrupt Governments, with 176.36 kickbacks per hour.