The Empire of Thewinterlab is a gargantuan, environmentally stunning nation, notable for its compulsory military service, infamous sell-swords, and irreverence towards religion. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical population of 12.153 billion Thewinterlabians are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The enormous, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Education, Defense, and Law & Order. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 60.4%.

The strong Thewinterlabian economy, worth 600 trillion Gold pounds a year, is quite specialized and led by the Automobile Manufacturing industry, with major contributions from Retail, Arms Manufacturing, and Furniture Restoration. Average income is 49,375 Gold pounds, but there is a significant disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 144,334 per year while the poor average 13,335, a ratio of 10.8 to 1.

Parents must choose their children's names from a government-mandated master list, administrative districts are increasingly defined by their taste in housing architecture, citizens are abandoning their homes en masse in a widespread panic over asbestos, and toddlers are wielding machine guns in the name of national defense. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Thewinterlab's national animal is the Snowy owl, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies.

Thewinterlab is ranked 234,404^th in the world and 8,117^th in Osiris for Most Cheerful Citizens, with 47.56 Percentage Of Water Glasses Perceived Half-Full.