The United States of Printer551 is a colossal, safe nation, remarkable for its rum-swilling pirates, ritual sacrifices, and infamous sell-swords. The hard-nosed, humorless population of 5.524 billion Printer551ians are prohibited from doing almost everything except voting, which they do timidly and conservatively.

The large, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Law & Order, Industry, and Administration. The average income tax rate is 90.0%.

The frighteningly efficient Printer551ian economy, worth 788 trillion cards a year, is fairly diversified and led by the Retail industry, with significant contributions from Uranium Mining, Information Technology, and Beef-Based Agriculture. Black market activity is extensive. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 142,675 cards, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 3.2 times as much as the poorest.

The public health bureaucracy is wrapped in miles of red tape, the government subsidises medicines of mass destruction, mall countdown clocks warn that there are only 364 more shopping days until Maxxmas, and grannies get pulled over for knitting pullovers while driving. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Printer551's national animal is the legendary, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

Printer551 is ranked 95,869^th in the world and 131^st in Two for Safest, scoring 83.57 on the Bubble-Rapp Safety Rating.